tim’s thought property

I may be losing my mind along with my possessions.
Today at work, I was going to leave, when I happened to notice the inside pocket of my jacket flapping with emptiness, due to no wallet. “Well, that’s odd,” I thought to myself, “I thought I put it back here, after I got my drink.” So, I looked in every pocket of my brown leather jacket, to no avail. I then went through my backpack “Why, surely it is in here,” I told myself. Nope. “Really?” I looked through again. Nope.
I paused, stroked my beard, then scratched my head. Where on earth was that thing? I could swear that I had used it two hours ago. I begun to rummage in the back room, looking about everywhere. I called home to ask if it was on the table or in my room. Nope.
In a subdued hurry, I went out to the cafe to see if it was around. I looked in the lost and found drawer, and there was still no sign of it. I pacified my greater anxiety by reminding myself this is almost a weekly occurrence, and I will find the thing eventually. So, I went through my bag a third time, with no leads. “Is it in the car?” I thought. “If it’s not there, maybe someone turned one in at the Chapter’s desk.”
So I briskly went out to my car to look for that darned wallet.

It was on the passenger seat.

“SON OF A BITCH!” I exclaimed at no one in particular, especially not the wallet. I wasn’t going to hold it against it. This was my brain’s fault, for sure. My brain fabricated this memory of me using my wallet to get a drink on my break, when I clearly had left this wallet on the seat of my car, and not touched it since 8:00 in the morning.
On my way back to my jacket and bag, I mused to why this sudden bout of senility. Was it the fact that I had taken to Cardigan fashion fifty years too soon? Was it the Newsboy Cap on my head? What could make my mind so fickle and false? Then I realized that I couldn’t possibly tell myself the answer. Not with my brain in there…..